I often wonder whether I am very different from how people exist. People chase goals. Relational, academic, and more. Their goalposts shift often, because there are comparisons and a sense of competitiveness. What drives their chase is immaterial; what they chase is material. I chase a feeling of pristinity. I
I like watching the rain. I hate the rain itself, but I like watching it as it pours. If it were to not touch anything and just crashed onto the ground, I would love it. One could say it is the gusty winds that accompany a storm that influence how
I sit weary and tired from directing AI to get various stuff that needs gotten done at work, obsessively cleaning and compulsively checking if my space is pristine and odour free. At times, it still feels like I simply cannot maintain it the way I need it to be. Why